Thursday, July 14, 2011

Celebrating Bayhem, Blockbusters and Summer Movies

Is this the worst summer ever for movies?  Because that's what everyone is saying these days.  I don't know about the worst, but it definitely feels like the most unoriginal.  Each Friday the latest summer flicks premiere, and every single one of them seems to be a sequel or involve superheroes.  But as a collective audience, we should be blaming ourselves, not lazy Hollywood screenwriters.  You know why?  Because these movies are making money.  Lots of it.  I mean, if a steaming pile of crap like "The Green Lantern" can earn $110 million domestically with four weeks of screen time, then we deserve junk in our cinemas.  We pay for the tickets; no one forces you to go see a movie when you can rent it On Demand or get it in the mail from Netflix.  So instead of pointing the blame finger at the studios for following the money at the expense of new plots and characters, turn it 180 degrees and point it back at yourself for supporting the production of such films with your wallet. 

But don't get the impression that I'm bashing this summer's movie lineup, because I'm not.  Did we really need a second "Hangover," a fourth "Spy Kids" and a fifth "Fast and the Furious?"  Of course not.  Nonetheless, I must admit that I was thoroughly satisfied by every movie I've seen this summer (X-Men: First Class, Hangover II, Super 8, and Transformers Dark of the Moon--more on that one in a moment).  They met or exceeded my expectations.  I had never seen an X-Men movie before, but the latest installment was very cool and had more of a James Bond polished feel to it.  "Hangover II" was a letdown compared to the first, but still provided the humor even though it fell into the classic sequel trap of trying to top its predecessor.  "Super 8" was a great movie for many reasons.  Although it felt like a blend of "Cloverfield," "E.T." and "Jaws," it was an homage to Steven Spielberg and qualifies as the most original movie of the summer.  Besides its great thrills and laughs, "Super 8" had a whimsical/curious/innocent childlike quality about it that made me look back on the more carefree days of my youth.  It was the perfect summer movie, which are supposed to be fun and entertaining popcorn flicks where you can turn your brain off for a couple hours and enjoy the air conditioning.  After all, you're not going to the theatres in July to see potential Oscar nominees, unless you buy a ticket for a Pixar production or a Christopher Nolan flick, so if a summer movie can offer a few laughs and some cool special effects then it has served its purpose. 

Which brings me to an equally popular and polarizing figure in Hollywood; Mr. Michael Bay, the teenage boy that never grew up.  To me, Bay's flicks epitomize summer blockbusters because they are always big, loud, and fun, and they manage to stand out by being bigger, louder, and more fun than the competition.  I have an absolute blast (no pun intended) while sitting back and letting the Bayhem overwhelm me for two-plus hours on a summer evening.  For those of you unfamilar with the term, Bayhem is a style of filmmaking that includes (but is not limited to) movie stars dealing with heartstopping car chases, falling buildings, dueling robots, sexy girls, hit-or-miss jokes, and many explosions, all essential ingredients in the successful summer movie recipe.  That's why I can't stand it when critics like Roger Ebert and Peter Travers constantly complain about lack of plot, lengthy running time, choppy editing, cheesy dialogue and an abundance of things that go boom in his movies.  They've seen all his movies from the past fifteen years, so what the hell do they expect from him?  I hate to say it, but these complaints make them sound like dinosaurs, the kind of cynics who would have opposed the automobile and rock and roll once upon a time.  Their criticisms are unfair for no other reason than they address staples of every Michael Bay movie.  All his movies are long, based on thin scripts, edited like music videos and rely on big budget special effects for gratuitous action.  At this point Bay is what he is and viewers should know what they're in for when they sit down to watch one of his movies.  Expecting anything more would be like expecting Dwight Howard to sink 90 percent of his free throws or Ichiro Suzuki to bang out 30 homers.  Not gonna happen, right?  But you accept them for what they do because they do it well.  That's the key, and Bayhem is the same way; if you don't embrace it for what it is, then you're going to be disappointed and miss out on a great time. 

So don't go trashing his movies, because no one is better at creating Bayhem and the perfect summer blockbuster than Michael Bay himself.

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